Relationships.....that is the title.

(I'm really in a blogging mood tonight)

Well, there's something I have been wondering about and it has been bugging me for a while....why are people so obsessed with my Singledom?? *giggles* But as I get older it seems to be a topic people (family) loves to bring up when they see me. No,I never had a boyfriend and No, I am not a lesbian are my usual responses to the questions the like to throw at me. And then when they ask me "Why????", I just shrug.

I think I shrug, because if I do answer the question, I would answer it with a deep meaningful answer and they still wouldn't understand. *shrugs*
Anyhoo, as I get older I'm beginning to understand more of why I choose to stay single

One reason would be that...well...I'm a little (ALOT) shy around men. Especially ones that I'm attracted to. Its hard to talk this over with my BFF because she has never had this problem with guys. I have a feeling she's been good with talking to guys since birth! But I'm getting better....a little....kinda. I mean, I just don't SEE enough guys in my daily life to actually have a conversation with. I know, I know....I should get out more. Don't worry....I've been starting to do that too! #win

Second reason....the few guys that do show interest in me....I'm just not into them. *shrugs* A lot of people might say I'm being picky, but I just can't seem to fake an emotion just because a guy is FINALLY interested in me. I just can't and I'm not going to. Because if I did that, he wouldn't see the real me and I would like for someone to see how goofy, silly, and weird I am in the beginning.

Finally....I think I have a fear of commitment. (screams) I have never been in a relationship and the older I get and the more I learn about who Letti is...I just dont' feel like being bothered. Or I think its just that being in a relationship is something that is unknown to me and I'm a little afraid of the unknown. But yet, I want to face it at the same time and see what it's about.

To sum up allll of this, I think my main problem is that everyone is rushing me to be in a relationship whether its a good or not!! I know there is someone or someone's (hehehe) out there for me, I just want to enjoy my life until I meet them.

Is that so hard to ask?

Vision/Goal/Inspirational Board...Update!!!

(I should try logging on here more often)

Anyhoo, well here is my semi-finished Board!! Look how fancy it is now!! *giggles* Ok, well it's not that fancy, but I try to use the creative part of my brain a lot more these days. Especially, now that classes are over and I have a lot of free time to think and be creative....or take a nap.



Ok, so here it is and my flowers!! I got all those flowers from the craft store that I work at. No, I don't go around yanking flower heads off of their plastic stems...sometimes...but these are what "fell" off and have been collected by the Floral department manager and thrown in a box. Of course I couldn't let her just throw them away....so I decided they should and WILL become a hair accessory someday!! THIS I SWEAR!!! (said in dramatic voice)



Next is my little gold Piggy bank!! Hehehehe!! I also got this from my store...when it went 80% off. But I always had my eyes on it and I was sooo happy when nobody bought him and he was marked down.....and then he was alll mine. You probably can't tell in the picture, but I spilled nail polish remover on him a couple of months ago and now he's a gold pig with silver tarnished scars...ah well.




And finally my Passport holder!!!! TA-DA!!!! Is my passport in there you say?? Nope! *womp womp* I hope to acquire my passport sometime in the near future and I can't wait to get it. But in the meantime I'll just enjoy looking at my holder til then.

My board is not fully complete because I feel like something is missing from it. I don't know what it is, but when I do, I'll make sure to let you know. :D

Good-Bye Crawling, Hello Walking!!

Well, I said I was going to make some changes and I did!! Here they are!!

1. I actually went to a Professor for help on a paper. Haven't done that since high school, but I placed my pride aside and went to my Professor for help with my writing. I am sooo glad that I did!! She helped me create a clear thesis, she helped me with topic sentences and everything!! I am soo proud of myself. Yay Me!!

2. I've finally spoke with the Internship advisor to help find an internship for the Fall and I'm super excited and nervous at the same time, but I know I'll be alright. ;D

3. Finally!! To obtain 1 and 2, I have gained alot of confidence in the last couple of months!! (round of applause) Thank you, thank you!! And I would like to thank my Spring Break!! Seriously!!

It was my first trip without my mom, just me and my BFF, so I was extremely nervous but it was one of the best times of my LIFE!! I met soo many awesome people, whether they worked on the ship or were my fellow Spring Breakers!! I did things I thought I never do (nothing X-rated I assure you), but like, I did Karaoke and danced with sooo many people!! Usually, I'm really reserved, but I decided to let everything go and just enjoy myself, and maaaann did I.


Sooo, thats it so far, but I'm not worried....because I know there's more awesome stuff to come!! whoohoo!!

Goal Board: Under construction

Ok so here's my goal board.....yes....it is not very pretty...but I'm working on it. And I already chose some quotes and stuff to stick on it too!!

"I have an Abundance of Wealth, Health and Happiness" I like to say this over and over in my mind. I'm trying to always have positive thoughts, so that I can give off positive vibes, so that I can have peace in my life. Because people sure do like to try and take that peace away!! But I'm not going to let them!!

"Sleep is like the unicorn-it is rumored to exist, but I doubt I will see any" - anonymous. This quote made me giggle because being in college.......you have a lot of loooonngg nights. Believe me!

"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment. - Ralph Waldo Emerson. I love this quote, because I think it fits me best!! My family said I always marched to my own beat and I quite agree! ;D

"Love isn't finding a perfect person. Its seeing an Imperfect person perfectly." - Sam Keen.I like this poem, because I hate it when people try to mold someone into someone else!! Why can't they be great, just the way they are?!?!?

So I kinda summed up a little bit of me into 4 quotes. Now isn't that nice? :D

Procrastination.....maybe I'll finish this post tomorrow..

Just kidding!!! But honestly procrastination is one of the most foul things to ever happen to anybody!! Espeically college students!!! Espeically for me!!! It's this weird mind disease that consumes me and keeps me from doing my work on time. And what makes this disease worse is that I love it!!! I mean I get this strange adrenaline rush just from the thought of not doing my papers on time. Like in the past if I knew I had a month to do a project I would wait a day before it's due to start it. And that's because I knew I had sooo much time to do it.

But no more.

I finally got my Goal Board (yay me!!) And the first thing I placed on there was all those papers that is due in the next couple of weeks. Tomorrow when I go on campus, I'm going to start the research for my 10 page paper and then by Tuesday I want to start typing it.

I'm serious!!! I'm really trying not to have any stress these last couple of weeks and this way everything will get done neatly and on time.

With my other class, I'm going to talk to my professor about that assignment, because I have no idea what she really expects from us. And I defintely need a good grade in that class, because I refuse to take it over!!!

So those are my goals and i'm sticking to them!!! :D

Step 1: Baby Steps

I said I was going to start with baby steps and I'm doing that first thing tomorrow!!!

Saturday night I bascially found out that a supposedly friend and co-worker is taking advantage of me. We both work in the same department and for the past 5 saturdays I had to work, while she took those days off. Finally next Saturday is my day off and I'm going to live it up!!! Well, she called this past saturday to asked what she worked for the rest of the week from another one of our friends and that friend told her that she has to work this coming up Satuday. Well this heffa said " oh that's ok, because I'm going right back around and taking that next saturday off!" And when my friend said "What about Arlette?" She was like "What about her!! I have things to do!!!" And usually her things to do is laying around at her momma's house. Oh and if your wondering how old she is.....she's 49.

*Blank Stare*

I always knew the bitch was selfish, but that right there pissed me off! For one thing I work part-time in a department and do a whole lot of other shit and don't get paid for it and then she expects me to work all those saturdays too?!?!? AH HELL NAW!!!

So decided right there that it's time for me to move on and I know that it's going to be for the best. Because I know if I can't leave now, I might never leave. And this definitely is some kind of sign for me to move on.

I'm trying, I'm trying.....or maybe I'm not.

Well I'm back....after a while. I thought I was trying to make some changes in my life, but it seems to take a little longer than a thought. I have the vision in my head to get a intership ( alot of them ) so I can find a career that would allow for me and my dog to travel. But it's like I'm stuck in the same stupid rut!!!!!!!!!! Correction: I AM still stuck in the same stupid rut!!! I think I just got to remember baby steps....will lead to walking.....which would turn into a jog.....then a run......and finally a LEAP!!!! :D